When my year-old son told me he was bringing his new girlfriend home to meet me, I chilled the wine and whacked a chicken in the oven. Clearly they were getting serious and I was so pleased and excited. Until he arrived home with a year-old woman. I opened the door to stare into a visage nearly as lined as my own. My own smile froze. I then noticed we were also wearing similar outfits. Five minutes into some rather awkward small talk in the living room, I realised that we were reading the same book and had just been to the same exhibition. I seemed to have much more in common with her than my son.
When I was younger I got my heart broken by an older woman. No matter what I said, or what nice things I did for Karen, she was out of my league since I was younger. Karen was a 17 year old junior, and I was an incredibly good looking and intelligent 16 year old. This is exactly what my mom told me every time I brought her cupcakes.
The rejection was devastating until a bright light named Stephanie joined my high school as a freshman. In fact, Stephanie was even more beautiful than her older sister, and I just had to pursue.
When women make the first move, the age gap dating norm is reversed. A year-old woman will have better luck messaging a year-old man.
We are seeing large age gaps in the dating pool, and not just the typical old-man-younger-woman narrative. For example, a AARP study reported that 34 percent of women over 39 years old were dating younger men. Add in the popularization of divorce over the last 50 years and the introduction of dating apps, and matters of love, sex and how we connect are utterly transformed.
Love is a melting pot. I find it refreshing that society has begun to validate the simple fact that relationships no matter how short or long can still be meaningful. Permanence is replaced with living in the present a mindful act and appreciating things for what they are now.
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I had a game I liked to play with this younger guy, a hilarious invention of my own called “Is He Dead? What, after all, had he done? A lot of us have found ourselves attracted to somebody younger or older, and have been reluctant to act on it because of some perceived weirdness or taboo. This kind of culling is even easier now that dating sites let us whittle our options down to the year. I contend that as long as nobody is being willfully creepy I see you, guys in Ferrari hats , this kind of limitation is mega lame.
I know many smoking-hot middle-aged people who are emotional teenagers. True, another factor is judgment from other people, who may see a year-old going to dinner with a year-old and make judgments about which one of them is drowning in student loan debt. Given the opportunity, your friends and strangers will judge you for being out with somebody who is too fat, too thin, to short, too Asian, too a stripper, whatever. It is up to you to be mutually happy with the person you date.
I learned this from experience, but also from Ludacris. Admittedly, I prefer older guys, only because they tend to be fully fused, like a human skull. The idea that young people like older people because of the financial security is irritating. I like the Civil War, documentaries, and talking about whiskey as though it were a zaftig prostitute, so old guys and I get along. Either he was self-conscious about dating a younger lady, or he tried to pay for everything because he thought I expected it.